Monthly Archives: January 2016

With vs. At 

I have come to realize that not many people are actually capable of listening. They “listen” but don’t seem to actually hear what is being said. 

It is very frustrating to talk to a person who refuses to listen or hear what you are saying to them. 

In personal conversations I have found that people often have two conversations happening at once. Two people speaking at each other rather with each other. They are not processing the information being told to them, they are just waiting for the other person to stop talking so that they can start. 

  
In other conversations, perhaps professional ones, it is very frustrating to have the same conversations over and over again. Having the same argument time after time, solves nothing and just gets very very annoying. 

I am just so tired of talking and not being heard. It feels awful and honestly like my voice does not matter. 

Why is our society so ok with these types of interactions? Why is it ok to be talked at rather than with? 

Monday blues 

Today I spent my entire prep period cleaning tables, sharpening pencils and vacuuming the rug. 

Tomorrow I have to do it all again because children are germ monsters who like to make messes and pick their nose and then touch stuff. 

Needless to say, I am not extactic about this. 

Happy Monday! 😔

Happiness is…

I decided many things this new year and created goals for myself. Sounds corny right? 

Well I decided I would find happiness in the little things and not try to expect the world to just hand it to me. 

So I’m starting this on my social medias and on my blog.

It’s called happiness is… 

  
I’m sure someone has already done this and it’s not trying to copy them or take credit for coming up with the idea, it’s just to remind myself to stay in the moment. To be grateful for the things around me, with me and happening to me. 

So happiness is the start to a better me.

Here’s hoping it inspires others to do the same. 

Stay safe out there! #blizzard2016

-Z 

Just do it! 

It is so important to treat yourself and to stay healthy. I find that sometimes we get so focused on helping and nurturing other people that we forget to focus on ourselves. 

Today was a big day for me personally. I joined a gym and worked out. 

Now to be fair, it’s a small gym and I worked out for a short period of time. But it’s a start and it’s something that I want to keep doing. 

I felt proud to be among people trying to better themselves and was in awe of how strong or flexible some people were. I felt empowered that I was taking control of my body and my health. It was a great feeling. 

Balancing teaching, social life, and working out is a tough thing to do. But sometimes you just have to find the time. Just find the strength and push yourself. 

I was exhausted and sore coming home from work. But I got dressed and went and did it. And now, I just feel so proud of myself. And I know I will continue to push myself to go and to have a healthier body as well as mind. 

  
I may be corny, I may celebrate things that seem insignificant to others. But this was a big achievement for me personally. And I wanted to share that joy with you all 🙂 

-Z 

Practice test? Practice life? 

Today my third graders took a practice ela test today. I have never seen such young kids have so much anxiety. 

They bit their nails and bit their lips. They were looking at the time as if it was their life line. 

It actually hurt to watch them take a test. A test that was just a practice one! 

I don’t know how I feel about giving 8 year olds such anxiety and stress. As a teacher shouldn’t we be preparing them for life? Yes stress is part of it but giving them it just seems counter productive. 

Sigh. 

The little things are the big things.

Today I was asked by someone who is not familiar with the struggles of teaching why I do this. He asked me why or how do I give up my time for working and going to school and doing this career. 

And when you put it down on paper. It looks bad. The number of hours you spend in the school itself. The number of hours you spend in college classes. The number of hours you spend trying to figure out how to motivate your kids or how to teach that one really tricky strategy. 

The amount of money you spend traveling every day just to get to work on time. The amount of money you spend on coffee in a month just to stay alert. The amount of money spent on education and education tests. 

It’s a lot. I’m not going to lie. And it’s hard to do. No doubt about that. 

But it’s the little things. It’s walking into the room and being greeted with smiles and hugs. It’s watching a child light up when they finally understand what you are talking about. It’s watching a child let you into his life when he tells you stories of his days. It’s the pictures you get that are filled with love and appreciation.

  
It’s the little things that make me forget how tired I am. Or how much I’d rather be in bed. It’s the little things that make me excited to see my kids every day, even if the days aren’t always good ones.

So yes, it is rough and tough and it is not for the weak of heart. It is for passionate people who are willing to devote themselves to the cause, the life, the role. 

That’s why I do it. That’s why I kill myself to try to become better. That’s why I spend most of my days around children. They make me better. They teach and inspire me to be better. My only goal? To do the same for them. 

-Z 

What is a social life? 

I have always put my education and my career first. I’ve always thought those were important things that should take first priority. And I have enjoyed putting in all my effort into something I am very passionate about. 

However, I have missed out on social things that I suppose are important to a certain extent. Like going out with friends or finding a significant other. 

It has always been a struggle for me to balance my passion for my education and career and having a social life. I feel like I can’t just half ass both. It should be 100% or nothing. 

But this mindset has left me without a social life.

So how do you balance these two aspects of life which could potentially be equally important? 

Sigh. It’s difficult to think of finding someone when you are too busy thinking about 31 different children that depend on you. It’s exhausting and idk how to find the energy to do both.